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February 14th is not only for the couples of the world. Valentine’s Day has never been more exciting than since you freed yourself of your broken marriage. Rather than having to share the V-Day bounty, use this day as an excuse to pamper and shower yourself with self-love. There is no reason you have to sacrifice the fine wine and caramel-filled chocolates just because you are flying solo this year. In fact, no one can prevent you from doing precisely what you want—and how you want—this Valentine’s Day.
You might expect your first Valentine’s Day after divorce to sting, but it can be quite the opposite with the right attitude. If you are tempted to mope your way through this Valentine’s Day, make the decision to turn the tables and celebrate love in a whole new way. Who better to shower you with affection than you?
In honor of the year’s most romantic holiday, here are some tips for falling in love with Valentine’s Day as a recent Massachusetts divorcé(e).
Splurge on something you’ve wanted for a long time.
Reward yourself for the courage to escape from a bad marriage and survive a divorce. Take advantage of Valentine’s Day sales meant to lure people into purchasing something extravagant for a loved one. Treat yourself to a small splurge—or big splurge—as a way to pamper yourself like no one else could.
Go on a date with a friend(s).
Few people can turn a frown upside down like close friends. Enlist a group of people who can easily distract you from the former significance of Valentine’s Day. Your friends are likely to know all about your newly-single status, so let them help you celebrate it.
Sweat out toxins in a spin class, work up a sweat in the gym, or feel the music in Zumba class. If you feel hurt, anger, or frustration taking over this February 14th, physical activity is an excellent way to channel those emotions, get those endorphins going, and boost feelings of empowerment and confidence.
If exercise isn’t for you, prepare yourself an elegant, healthy dinner with the freshest ingredients, or pamper yourself at the spa. If you no longer have your spouse to give you those awkward, overly-tough back massages, allow a professional to fill the position. Afterwards, you will feel relaxed and refreshed.
Watch a horror, action, or sci-fi movie.
Tune out the romance with zombies, explosions, aliens, and car chases. Some of the most thrilling movies do not require much thought. Get lost in another uncomplicated, un-romantic world with a giant bowl of buttered popcorn.
Get yourself a Valentine’s Day card.
This probably sounds very silly, but you should be reminding yourself that you are an incredible, beautiful human who deserves all the love and happiness in the world. This Valentine’s Day is about self-love, so help the message along by writing yourself a little self-love letter. Remind yourself of the accomplishments of the past year, your plans for the future, your strengths, and all that you have to offer yourself and others. Tuck the message away as a wonderful memento to occasionally remind yourself of its content.
Call your parents.
You probably owe your dad a phone call. Give a family member a call to catch up, plan a visit, and fill each other in. Get yourself a dose of that very special mother’s love and affection.
Go out for Happy Hour with fellow singles.
Turn a notoriously couple-y holiday into another excuse to go out with the guys or ladies. Rather than wallowing in the idea that you are single, simply enjoy each other’s company and toast to another year of friendship, health, and happiness. Take conversations about romance, marriage, and divorce off the table and enjoy this V-Day in a special, different way.
Get yourself some chocolates or flowers.
Just because you can no longer rely on your ex-spouse to send you a bouquet of roses doesn’t mean you can’t buy them yourself. Brighten up a room and improve your mood with a colorful arrangement of your favorite flowers. Let them serve as a reminder that no one can be a better Valentine to you than, well, you!
Valentine’s Day is what you make of it. For some people, it’s all about candlelit dinners, life-size teddy bears, and over-priced floral arrangements. For others, it serves merely as a painful reminder of aloneness. Keep in mind that you have the power to flip the narrative and make February a celebration of self-love and all of the other love you have in your life.